deleterius: Clipart spork, metallic. (Agent Dawn McKenna)
2014-10-29 04:02 pm

Deleterius: "The Beginning of a New Age", sporked by Enelya Linde

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Story Or Series Title: The Beginning of a New Age
Fandom: Lord of the… oh, never mind… I’M SO SAD MAH HUBBY IS GONE! Oh, look—Peredhills! yaY!
Culprit Author's Name: Mirlanthiriel
Full Name (plus titles if any): Miriel
Full Species(es): human? Elf? thing...
Hair Color (include adjectives): n/a
Eye Color (include adjectives): n/a
Unusual Markings/Colorations: n/a
Special Possessions (if any): A shiny diamond from Varda. Kill me now.
Annoying Origin: Hurricane Katrina
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: She meets all the Elfses. Glorfindel, Cirdan, Galadriel, Celeborn, Thranduil, Legolas, Elladan, Elrohir, Elrond, Haldir... gets adopted by Galadriel and Celeborn...
Annoying Special Abilities: Makes wine, farms, makes fishing nets, fixes fountains, lives alone for years upon years, keeps chickens, apparently rebuilds Grey Havens... ow.
Other Annoying Traits: Got smoozed up into Arda after Hurricane Katrina... doesn't appear to have any name but Miriel...

[DawnFire's note: Some non-bolded sporker's commentary has been bolded for readability. Also, for warnings: some language, mentions of heart-eating, and, um...the Sue eats worms at one point. Ick.]

Please include a small sample of the worst of this story: )
deleterius: Clipart spork, metallic. (Agent Dawn McKenna)
2014-06-02 03:40 pm

Deleterius: "Goodbye My Loverx", sporked by Enelya Linde

Caitlinn Black XXxxXXxxXX! ... erm, Greenleaf...

Story Or Series Title: Goodbye My Loverx ( http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2713088/1/ )
Fandom: Lord of the Lego-luv
Culprit Author's Name: xXxCaitlinnBlackxXx ( http://www.fanfiction.net/u/907773/ )
Full Name (plus titles if any): Caitlinn Greenleaf
Full Species(es): Human?
Hair Color (include adjectives): Auburn, long, down-to waist
Eye Color (include adjectives): Unmentioned?
Unusual Markings/Colorations: ehh, none mentioned.
Special Possessions (if any): Legolas' nards. Not that they're that speshul anymore...
Annoying Origin: Hell
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: Married to Legolas? Knows someone named 'Gandelf...'
Annoying Special Abilities: Can produce a Single Tear.
Other Annoying Traits: Being alive... but that won't last long...

[DawnFire's note: Arwen's lines have been changed from white to light blue for ease of reading. Also, warning: mild language and name-calling]

Please include a small sample of the worst of this story: )
deleterius: Clipart spork, metallic. (Agent Dawn McKenna)
2013-12-10 07:15 pm

Deleterius: "Beautiful Shame", sporked by Enelya Linde

Legolas with spleen and pancreas

Story Or Series Title: Beautiful Shame
Fandom: Cannibal!Legolas' Fandom of DOOM
Culprit Author's Name: Erik'sSexyKitty
Full Name (plus titles if any): Arimina, "'Mina"
Full Species(es): Erm... Human?
Hair Color (include adjectives): Unknown
Eye Color (include adjectives): Unknown
Unusual Markings/Colorations: Ehhh... chains?
Special Possessions (if any): A horrid past
Annoying Origin: Some king kidnapped her and that's where we come in...
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: Rescued by Legolas and Aragorn. Snork.
Annoying Special Abilities: Evading said sicko king?
Other Annoying Traits: None... yet...

[DawnFire's note: lightly NSFW due to the sporker talking about internal organs that are no longer internal. No real gore, though, hence 'lightly'.]

Please include a small sample of the worst of this story: )
deleterius: Clipart spork, metallic. (Agent Dawn McKenna)
2013-12-10 07:01 pm

Deleterius: "Seeking Refuge", sporked by Enelya Linde

Story Or Series Title: Seeking Refuge
Fandom: lord of the rings
Culprit Author's Name: whitedino
Full Name (plus titles if any): Rebecca
Full Species(es): Supposedly Human, lives on the edge of Bree in middle earth
Hair Color (include adjectives): Tangled, filth ridden, ebony
Eye Color (include adjectives): 'nearly matched the greenary that surrounded [her]
Unusual Markings/Colorations: none
Special Possessions (if any): A Little Brother
Annoying Origin: Wicked stepfather beat her, someplace near Bree
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: Living in a world that jacked the name of their canonical world. And the names of its places.
Annoying Special Abilities: Crying, swooning, good judge of character
Other Annoying Traits: She was beaten. And knows lots of handy people.


Please include a small sample of the worst of this story: )
deleterius: Clipart spork, metallic. (Default)
2013-08-26 03:49 pm
deleterius: Clipart spork, metallic. (Agent Dawn McKenna)
2013-05-30 09:57 pm
deleterius: Clipart spork, metallic. (Agent Dawn McKenna)
2013-05-30 09:52 pm
deleterius: Clipart spork, metallic. (Agent Dawn McKenna)
2013-05-30 09:30 pm

Deleterius: "Kindred: The Embraced ~Vampire Waltz~", sporked by Lily Winterwood (Part 1) - NSFW!

Why Vampires and Cylons Don't Mix

Story Or Series Title: Kindred: The Embraced ~Vampire Waltz~ (whut a title. And it's not even original. I heard that Kindred was once a TV show with the same premise.)
Fandom: Battlestar Twilightica
Culprit Author's Name: Princess Arinayed
Full Name (plus titles if any): Starlight Amoret Adama, totally not a Suvian name. *eyeroll* (I am officially calling her Renesmee squared.)
Full Species(es): Diabola gothica gratuita

Hair Color (include adjectives): "long raven hair with red streaks"
Eye Color (include adjectives): "Her left was a deep blue while her right and emerald"
Unusual Markings/Colorations: Vampire fangs, weird eyes
Special Possessions (if any): Bill Adama's sanity. I'm not kidding. He's so out of character.
Annoying Origin: The mind of a Suethor fresh out of Twilight and Kindred: The Embraced (the TV show)
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: Bill Adama (That's it, I refuse to call him that. He is officially Bill Cullen.) and Laura Roslin (aka Laura Swan)'s daughter (wait, shouldn't Laura be, like, half dead? Renesmee squared is a frakking half-vampire!), Lee and Zak's sister, Laura's student, etc, etc.
Annoying Special Abilities: Daddy's Little Bitch Girl; the ability to summon a limo out of nowhere; the ability to be uber annoying; the power of UnCanon; the ability to make her dad a perv; OMG SPESHUL VAMP!MAGIC abilities; the ability to use said OMG SPESHUL VAMP!MAGIC abilities in a sci-fi continuum; the ability to speak the OMG SPESHUL VAMP!LANGUAGE; etc, etc.
Other Annoying Traits: Making Adama the prince of a democratic government.
Please include a small sample of the worst of this story:

Read more... )
Part 1 (consecutive) )Part 2 (consecutive) )
deleterius: Clipart spork, metallic. (Agent Dawn McKenna)
2013-05-30 06:29 pm

Deleterius: "Emerald Book II: Ivorwen", sporked by Lily Winterwood

Story Or Series Title: tEmerald Book II: Ivorwen, second in the Emerald trilogy.
Fandom: Lord of the Family Jewels Rings
Culprit Author's Name: ShilohPR
Full Name (plus titles if any): Princess Emerald of Arathilien, aka Generic UnCanon Fantasy Land
Full Species(es): Sidhia tolkienii uncanonicus fantasylandia, or, Tolkien Elf!Sue and Creator of Geographical Aberrations!Sue (DOGA, take note)

Hair Color (include adjectives): Red hair...RED HAIR! What is it with red hair and Elvish Mary Sues?
Eye Color (include adjectives): Green. See above statement.
Unusual Markings/Colorations: Freckles. Now she’s a frikkin’ Irish lass with Elf ears. (Sorry to all Irish lasses though…Emerald really does give you a bad name.)
Special Possessions (if any): A…sword, is it? And a yellow flower.
Annoying Origin: From the loins of Original Character King Orwig came one half of the chromosomes, from the ovaries of OC Queen Lilwen came the other half. Sperm meets egg, and lo! We shall have a Sue in nine months.
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: Aparently “Vána and Romy” got her to get into a boat. OC Nurse Svea suspects “Romy” is Oromë. Which means the Valar took Little Miss Mary (Sue) on a boat ride.
Annoying Special Abilities: The ability to create Geographical Aberrations such as “Arathilien” and “Lond Daer”. Burn Arathilien and Lond Daer with much hate, please.
Also responsible for the creation of Minis Tirith, the mini-City and general hangout for mini-Balrogs and other minis.
Other Annoying Traits: Being more annoying than my Health teacher when she covered Family Life Education.
Please include a small sample of the worst of this story:

Read more... )
deleterius: Clipart spork, metallic. (Agent Dawn McKenna)
2013-05-30 06:14 pm

Deleterius: "Elaine's Prophecy", sporked by Lily Winterwood (Eledhwen Elerossiel and Lori)

Story Or Series Title: tElaine’s Prophecy
Fandom: You know, that place with a few Hobbits and evil rings...
Culprit Author's Name: Alonia187
Full Name (plus titles if any): Elaine Legolas Greenleaf, Queen of Mirkwood, Princess of “Middle-Earth”
Full Species(es): Puella moderna prophesida, if Mhari’s Mary Sue Classifications are of any indication.

Hair Color (include adjectives): Author does not mention it...for now.
Eye Color (include adjectives): See hair color
Unusual Markings/Colorations: Nothing noted...for now.
Special Possessions (if any): A (possible Deus ex Machina) necklace of Mary Sue-ness and a sapphire “mere elvish ring”.
Annoying Origin: The mind of a Suethor just about to go to sleep.
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: Legolas’s twoo wuv, other connections still not stated.
Annoying Special Abilities: The ability to change into Mulier bitchia at the speed of words.
Other Annoying Traits: Being a (self-proclaimed) Princess of “Middle-Earth”.
Please include a small sample of the worst of this story:


Okay then, so for this sporkage, I’m introducing Eledhwen Elerossiel (my PPC Agent, who I shall shamelessly masquerade as for the duration of this spork) and her science teacher buddy Lori (“Hello everyone! I’m Lori and I’m actually really really young.” “Oh, give me a break, Lori. You’re not fooling anyone.” *sob*)

Alrighties...on with the show sporkage.
Read more... )
deleterius: Clipart spork, metallic. (Agent Dawn McKenna)
2013-05-30 05:44 pm
deleterius: Clipart spork, metallic. (Agent Dawn McKenna)
2013-05-13 07:42 pm

Surviving Material from Deleterius

The following material was compiled sometime before January 2010, and has been categorized for ease of reading. It all comes from the now-deleted community called Deleterius, and was saved in a document on my computer (labelled 'notesquotesdeleterius', if you're curious.) I believe there are more quotes hiding somewhere; if I find them, I'll add them in. If anyone else has surviving material—quotes, reports, anything—feel free to either send it to me to add in or post it somewhere yourself and add a link to the list here.

Kelly )
Assassins )
On Suethors and Sueish Racism: a Conversation (or most of it) )
On Sue Names and Heredity and the Flaws Therein )
An Excerpt from Harry and Ron's MST of a Sue Named Emily )
Excerpts from the MST of Raven the Sue )
Snape/Sue Fics and My New (Old) Headcanon )
A Snippet from an MST By 'M' and 'BD', or In Which Harry Smirks )
Bad Guys and a Sue Named Cherry, aka Ideas DawnFire Wanted to Write )
A Comment By Brightshadow (aka DawnFire). Witness the Incredulous Use of Three Exclamation Points! )
The End! (for now...)

Divisions are approximate, but hopefully accurate. Nothing has been edited, beyond the divisions. If you know who wrote any of these, please feel free to tell me, as I have no idea, and I'll attribute it. Other than that, hope you enjoyed!

~DawnFire